Air Hose

Most football coaches I know, and for that matter most men I know, love their wives and families. That's never a problem. The problem sometimes becomes "How do we love our wives?" What does that look like? The Bible says that men are to love their wives as Christ loved the church. And just what does that mean? Author Steve Farrar put it like this, "He is willing to get hurt for his wife. He is even willing to die for his wife, if necessary. But in most cases his love will mean sacrificing anything in order to care for his wife." I like that. Have I always done it? I have failed miserably many times in my 41 years of marriage, but I go back and try again. There are many little things we can do to love our lives and here's just one example. This is one I worked on myself.

I know that we are to build our wives up, to build their self-esteem, not tear it down or "deflate" so to speak their confidence. So, think of the term "air hose". Any time you make a cutting remark, put down, or use a sarcastic tone, particularly in front of others, you're cutting off her air hose of self-esteem and confidence. So don't do that. Compliment her; praise her, especially in public or with others. Now I wish I could take credit for this, but I heard the concept of “air hose” from one of our elders in church one Sunday as he was delivering the message. He shared that this was a concept that he had been working on with a friend. When they were together with their wives, if either would say anything remotely or blatantly unflattering of their wives the other would simply say, "Air hose". It was a way for them to be accountable to each other for loving their wives properly. It was a reminder from one friend to another.

Of course, there are many other ways we can love our wives, but this is certainly one we can all work on. I've got a long way to go but I keep trying to improve. So guys don't step on her air hose.
www.chiefpigskin.com

Surprise 'Em, Dad

It was our usual routine to get the kids up on Sunday mornings and go to church. We weren't legalistic about it or anything, didn't do it to score points with God or earn our way to heaven, we just thought it was a good family practice. So our four kids were used to the routine and accepted it as part of life. Every now and then something special would come up on the schedule and we would honor another committment, usually a larger family type activity with grandparents or the like. But sometimes we just changed the routine, especially in the summer, and did something different. It would usually go something like this...

A beautiful summer morning would be developing and as my wife and I would awaken around 7a.m. or so one of us would suggest, as we lay there being just a little lazy, enjoying sleeping in a bit, "Wanna go to a ballgame?" My wife would suggest this as often as I would. You have to understand, my wife is not too into sports but she LOVES going to a baseball game. Heck, I love all sports and would go to a game of any kind any time! So if she suggested first, I was ready to go. And if I suggested first, she was just as willing. Well, by 8a.m. we would go to the kids rooms and rouse them out of bed with the announcement, "We're going to a ballgame! Get out of bed and get ready!" As soon as they heard those words they were out of bed, into their summer clothes and ready to hit the road. A quick breakfast later, and we were all in the car headed to St. Louis. We lived in Central Illinois and were about 2 1/2 to 3 hours from Busch Stadium. This was back in the 80's and early 90's and we could always jet down and get some bleacher seats for about six bucks apeice. These days, you can hardly get a bleacher seat the day of the game, the ball park's just about always full. Anyway, we'd get our bleacher seats and be in the park by noon. I always wanted to watch batting practice while the wife and my girls got something to munch on. My son would hang over the outfield wall hoping to coax a tossed ball from one of the players shagging flies. It was a great atmosphere on a warm, sunny Sunday afternoon.

One particular time when my son was about ten or eleven years old and hanging over the wall with about a dozen or so other little boys about the same age, I witnessed an amusing incident that has always stuck with me. The boys were yelling at some San Francisco Giant players who were shagging flies in BP. One of the Giants was a pitcher named Kelly Downs and the boys were yelling for a ball. Well, the Giants weren't paying much attention so finally one of the boys yelled out, "Kelly's a girls name!" Well, Kelly heard him. He turned around slowly and glared at the boys. They either scattered or backed away from from the wall with their eyes big as silver dollars. They were a bit scared. The boys all pointed at the guilty party as they backed away from the wall, my son included. Ole Kelly walked slowly to the wall with that glare and then...broke into a big smile, pointed and waved at the boys and tossed 'em a ball. He just grinned and joined his teammates in the outfield. Now how cool was that of Kelly? He just had some fun with the boys and they all grinned too. I thought he handled it great and he certainly made a fan out of me.

I can't remember who won the game that day, I guess it doesn't matter. What matters is that we had a fun family day and I didn't realize how much the kids enjoyed it until years later when they were all grown up with kids of their own and I overheard one of them saying to the others, "Hey, remember when Mom and Dad would get us up and go to a ballgame instead of goin' to church? That was so much fun!" I didn't realize how much they enjoyed it, but I'm glad we took 'em to a ballgame.

Thanks again to www.chiefpigskin.com for giving me the opportunity to share stories about football, being a dad, a husband, and anything else about life that I have learned. To all you football coaches, good luck to you and your teams as we come down the stretch of the regular season. Talk to you soon.