Raising My Kids Differently

My four kids are all grown up now with families of their own. All four got their college degrees, married great spouses, and have children of their own. They are all teachers, coaches, active in their communities, churches, and are great parents. “Wow!” you must be thinking, “this guy and his wife must’ve done a wonderful job raising their kids!” I wish we could take some credit but the truth is the Lord intervened and covered for some of our serious mistakes. My wife and I look back now and just shake our heads in disbelief. “What were we thinking?” In our weak defense, we did marry very young. In fact, we were both teenagers. That was really not that uncommon back in the day. Neither of us had any kind of child rearing training, we just did what our parents did. But for the benefit of those of you that have young children or thinking of having children, here’s what I would do different if you care to listen.

• No spanking. Now we didn’t really spank that much, although our kids might disagree, but I think I would stick to other forms of discipline.
• Not take my anger of someone else out on my children.
• Not be quite as strict and serious.
• No sarcasm. Geez, I was bad at that.
• No husband – wife fighting in front of the kids. This was probably our worst mistake.
• Tell my wife I love her more in front of the kids.
• Give my wife a good hug and kiss more in front of the kids. (Show that I love their mother).
• Tell my kids more often I love them.
• Praise more, much more.
• More family vacations.
• Everyday encourage each of my children to tell me the best and worst part of their day. (communication)
There are more, but that’ll do for now.

Things I would not change or do differently.
• Love them fiercely.
• Take them to church every Sunday. (unless we were going to a Cardinal game)
• Talk openly and often about God, the Bible, and Jesus.
• Encourage them to play sports.
• Emphasize excellent attendance in school.
• Set high academic and social expectations.

Well, I wish I could do it over again but I can’t. I know I gave my kids some emotional bruises that will stick with them and I regret that. But it’s never too late to improve and be a better grandparent, right?
Chiefpigskin.com